After 70 days I have lost 42.2 pounds which is right about half of what I wanted to lose!
The best is yet to come :) Just so everyone knows, this blog isn't as cheerful as usual. I am not trying to make your Tuesday miserable, I am simply letting you in to all aspects of my life. As always, I hope you enjoy my writing as much as I like writing to you.
For many of the people in the Rogers community, we know loss way too well. We have seen it through suicide and natural disaster. We have seen it through car accidents and illness and for many of the victims, it comes far too early.
Now I am not just writing for people from Rogers as most people have dealt with death before. You heart sinks. You think of the family and what they might be going through. You might cry. You might get angry. You might meet with your friends or you might say a little prayer.
To me prayer is something that I always do when I hear about a family going through a tough time. When Sandy Hook happened a year ago, the first thing I did was pray for the families. Pray for everyone in schools, that they will never have to experience something like that. Most times I do not tell the people who I am praying for that I am praying for them because I don't think that I need to. Prayers are my conversation with God and every night, for about 10-15 minutes, I get to sit and have a conversation with someone who does nothing but listen. I ask everyone who has passed to look down on me. I pray to Megan and ask her to always help me through the tough times in life. I pray for her family and the families of anyone who has experienced a death in their family. One thing that I never got to do before Megan passed was tell her how much she meant to me as a friend. We were planning on hanging out soon but our lives got in the way and I never got that opportunity to thank her for being the easiest person to talk to. It is because of Megan that I am the way I am today.
From February 20th, 2012 to today I have learned a lot about myself. I have learned to enjoy the present and to stay positive in life.
To me, there is one thing that might be as important as praying and that is telling the people you care about that you love them. Say it early and say it often. I don't care if they are your parents, your brother, your sister, your best friend, your roommates, your classmates, your friends, or whoever else it is. If you care about them, let them know. Since the worst day of my life I have had a different impact on life. I stay positive for the most part. If I am tweeting, many times they have LOL or :) on them. If I am texting you, there is a chance that I am using smiley faces and/or exclamation points. I am doing that because I am that happy with how my life is going. When I call my mom and I am about to hang up, I always tell her I love her and the same when I am going to bed. I don't care that I am 22. If Cassidy falls asleep while we are texting (like she usually does) I always make sure that I send a "love you" text so that if anything were to happen, she would know how much she means to me.
At the end of the day none of us know if we are going to be here for the next day. I am the biggest believer in the saying that, "Everything happens for a reason." I am not sure why car accidents and tornados have to happen. I am not sure why illness has to happen or why there isn't a cure to cancer, all I do know is that God has a plan. He isn't going to send you down a path that you can't make it through. It might be tough at times but he will be there to hold your hand and push you through.
So as you are going to see your families this Christmas that you haven't seen for a while, don't forget to give them a hug and let them know how much you care. Much too often we don't know we are running out of time, until it is much too late.
So from me to you, if you are reading this, you hold a special place in my heart. If you have experienced a loss or are going through a hard time, know that I am praying for you tonight and every night.
I love you all.
-J-
-J-
